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Devin’s Tails: How Pets Would Sum Up Their Lives

Kimberley Pearson's Chinchilla - TAILSBy Devin O’Branagan

One of my most popular books is a humorous novella titled SHOW DOG SINGS THE BLUES, about a prissy, pampered Australian Shepherd named Talisman who is mistaken for a cowdog. People like it, in part, because it’s told from the dog’s perspective. I’m planning a series of novellas written from Talisman’s perspective about her life adventures. So, I started thinking about titles for those books, and that led to a stream of consciousness moment about various animals I know and what their autobiographies might be called, and before I knew it I made a post on Facebook asking what my friends’ pets might title their own autobiographies. As it turned out, we have a LOT of fascinating animals out there. Don’t believe me? Take a look at how they would sum up their lives:

– Julie Campbell’s Border Collie would call her autobiography: SHEEP, A DOG’S TALE.

– K.L. Schwengel’s dog? LIFE AS A … BRIGHT SHINY, BRIGHT SHINY!

– Jenny Bolter’s cat, Oreo, would call hers, THE ANNOYED PRINCESS, since she thinks she is a princess and the other cats annoy her all the time.

– Dean Manning’s Sassy would call hers, HOW TO GET WHAT YOU WANT WITHOUT ACTUALLY WHINING. Crissy’s would be, INSIDE VOICE? WHAT INSIDE VOICE?

– Lisa Kilgore Giroux’s darling? MY NAME IS DALLY; HOW I FOUND MY INNER POODLE.

– FOOD AND HOW TO ACQUIRE IT, LEGALLY AND OTHERWISE -Susan Ernstrom Roberts

– Tammy E. A. Crosby’s dogs? Ginger (aka Fatdog): HOW TO HUNT INANIMATE OBJECTS. Max the puppy: HOW TO NEVER RUN OUT OF HOUSEHOLD STUFF TO PEE ON.

– Jennifer McCourt’s Belle would title hers: THE DIVA DOG DIARIES. Arizona’s would be: LOYALTY ABOVE ALL ELSE.

– Stacy Mantle’s dogs would be: HERDING CATS, and the cats would call theirs: BECOME THE MASTER OF YOUR DOG-MAIN.

– Kathy Glaes’ new puppy: MY FIRST NINE WEEKS.

– DESPERATE AND LONELY: HOW I TRIED TO HAVE SEX WITH A SHOE -Fawn Parker [Note to readers from Devin: this is, paws down, my favorite of the lot! Yes, I admit it…writers are eccentric creatures.]

– SILENCE OF THE LAMBS -Austin Griffith

– STAY IS A FOUR LETTER WORD -Margi Knarr

– RUNNING WITH THE DOGS -Marni Chartier

– A DOG’S LIFE: TAILS OF THE SPOILED AND PAMPERED -Lynn Blocker

– HOW TO PICK POCKETS FOR TREATS -Cassie Arkalis

– ONE WAG AT A TIME -Julie Golden

– I CAME, I SAW, I CHEWED -Josh Langston

– I CAME, I SAW, I CONQUERED HER HEART -Gail James

– PARTY ANIMAL -Susan Ballek Figlar

– TABLE SHARK, A TAIL OF WAITING IMPATIENTLY -Patti Macdonald

– THE ART OF HUMAN MANIPULATION -Karen Wingert Mittan

– TALES FROM THE TAILLESS, LIFE AS AN AUSTRALIAN SHEPHERD -Nancy Higginson

– TALK TO THE PAW -Maureen Doohan

– NO BONES ABOUT IT -Paula Kardum-Booth

– URBAN HERDING -Paige Johnson

– WHO ME? -Pamela A. Gagnon

– FOR THE LOVE OF SOCKS -Elizabeth Chachi

– WHAT I TAUGHT MY HUMAN! -Laura De La Cruz

– THE THINGS I’VE EATEN -Patti Macdonald

– SNIFFS AHOY! -Myra Fourwinds

– MY DOG TAIL…NO ANDS, SNIFFS, AND BUTTS ABOUT IT! -Paula Kardum-Booth

– And the most touching of them all: IF YOU ONLY KNEW HOW MUCH I TRULY LOVED YOU…  -Yingin Yang

A note about today’s image by photographer Kimberley Pearson. When I asked permission to use it, she said, “Stinky (the chinchilla) is hoping for world domination so he’ll love the fame!”

Copyright © 2013 – Devin O’Branagan – All Rights Reserved

Devin O’Branagan is a bestselling author who writes novels about uncommon heroes. Her genres include young adult urban fantasy, paranormal thrillers, comic mysteries, and fiction about dogs and cats. She is a member of the Dog Writers Association of America, and many of her writing projects support animal rescue. Her books have been published by Simon & Schuster’s Pocket Books in English, Heyne Verlag in German, and Dogan Egmont in Turkish. All of her books are available in both print and eBook formats. Visit her website at DevinWrites.com.

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